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This meeting could've been an email
Agile Standup Suffering
15 minutes my ass
O RLY?
@scrum_victimAgile Standup Suffering
npm install left-pad
10000 Dependencies
node_modules weighs 2GB
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@npm_addict10000 Dependencies
SELECT * FROM production
Oops I Dropped the Database
WHERE backup = false
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@root_accessOops I Dropped the Database
Just mass assign everything
Copying from Stack Overflow
I have no idea what this does
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@ctrl_c_devCopying from Stack Overflow
Async/await solves everything
Callback Hell Survivor
.then().then().then().catch()
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@promise_keeperCallback Hell Survivor
It works on my machine
Fixing Bugs in Production
YOLO deployments
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@10x_developerFixing Bugs in Production
Let me just refactor this real quick
Refactoring Forever
The feature can wait
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@clean_code_broRefactoring Forever
Senior dev reviews your PR
Surviving Code Reviews
Why did you do it this way?
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@junior_tearsSurviving Code Reviews
I'll add tests later
Test-Driven Excuses
Coverage is just a number
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@tech_debt_lordTest-Driven Excuses
It's a feature, not a bug
Gaslighting Your PM
Works as designed
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@scope_creepGaslighting Your PM